23.11 I arrive at the Gym. Quiet, then loud - the noise and different sounds that filter through my headphones, through the music I'm listening to as I run and later, as I row. The sound of a skipping rope. The humming and vibration of the traffics outside. Then the lights from the 29 bus, reflecting in the glass of the front window, where I run and look out. I can't really see the people passing by, just glimpses of shoes, high heels, groups of people going somewhere. It's Saturday night. I'm in the Gym. I'm happy ii made it here. It's been my plan and I achieved it. This will be routine. I look forward to next time.
I hear parts of my music, parts of my music thoughts - of course I hear them all the time, but most of the time I seem to flicker between the actual present time - me running and listening to Arcade Fire, and a dream like state of thoughts, sudden very clear ideas, inspiration and new energy. I appear to be very focused and in a very creative place, suddenly everything seems clear and I feel I am able to plan, make various schedules of plans, reL plans, not just the ones I seem to have been making for too long; the trivial tasks and satisfying little minds and big egos, all with a smile, all part of the service. There, on the running machine and later pulling at the rowing machine's handle bar, I felt alive. For the first time in weeks. I felt. I was. Ich bin. Ich bauen. The Heidegger theory came to me - this thing about the little trivial everyday stuff, the things that stops us seeing the bigger picture. I felt that then, I understood.
I then realised I was in the middle of another place I have only been in through reading about it, the Heterotopia. Or a Heterotopia. The kind that allows the mind to place itself somewhere in-between. And the one where you stay still, whilst running a distance; the running machine as Heterotopia.
02.14 I leave.
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